This message was preached by Colin Dcruz at Word of Grace Church on January 6th 2019. To listen/download the audio please click here. To listen to the Sunday's worship and prophetic contributions please click here.
When you get a new gadget, what do you do? Do you just open it up and start using it right away? Or do you go through the manual? Usually, men hate to go through the manual. For us to know about a gadget and to use it correctly, we need to go through the manual that is prepared by the person who actually created the gadget.
Similarly, for us to know about marriage and to take it further successfully, we need a manual. We need a manual from the one that has created marriage. That is God! And the manual is the Bible. We get all our instructions from the Bible.
The Bible starts with marriage (between Adam and Eve) and ends with marriage (between Christ and the Church). And in between, there are many other marriages.
Marriage is very important to God.
We can see 8 ‘M’ s in the book of Genesis.
1. Marvellous
Gen 1:1-31 – All through the first chapter of Genesis, we see that God created everything through his word – just by speaking. Every time he created something, he said that it was good. In total God said “it is good” 6 times in the first chapter.
2. Man
Gen 2:7 – Then the Lord God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.
Though God created the entire creation through his word, he created man in a different way. He used his hands to fashion man in His own image.
3. Mission
Gen 2:15 – The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it.
This means the man should not be idle but be productive. He should work and take care of the garden.
4. Missing
Though God made everything, he found out that something was missing.
Gen 2:18 – The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
Knowing that it is not good for the man to be alone, God decided to make a helper that is suitable for him.
5. Miss
Gen 2:21-22 – So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
Though God sent all the birds and animals to Adam to name them, he didn’t find any suitable helper. That’s when God made Adam fall into a deep sleep, took out one of his ribs and made woman out of it and brought her to the man.
Gen 2:23 – The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh, she shall be called ‘Woman’, for she was taken out of the man.”
6. Marriage
Marriage is not just a good thing but a Godly thing. God did not make another man as a helper to Adam but made a woman. This is God’s plan and will. God created marriage.
Gen 2:24 – That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
7. Mystery
Marriage is not just about man and woman but it’s more than that.
Eph 5:31-32 – For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery – but I’m talking about Christ and the church.
Marriage between husband and wife is similar to marriage between God and His chosen people. This is the final marriage that takes place
8. Method
8. Method
Eph 5:33 – However, each of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
So, husbands love your wives just as Jesus laid down his life for the church. A husband dominating is not biblical.
Eph 5:25 –Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the Word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.
When husband and wife are both employed, they need to take equal responsibilities when they get back home from work. In most of the families, we see that the husband leaves everything to the wife.
Wives must respect the husbands.
Marriage is a good thing and also a Godly thing.
Now, let us look at the ingredients.
In order to make a chicken curry, we need ingredients and method (steps to follow)
In marriage, husband and wife are the ingredients and the method to follow is –
The husband should lay down his life for wife and wife should respect husband.
Eph 5:24 – Man will leave his mother and father and be united to his wife.
This is about leaving the parents and be united to wife. Husband’s mother must let go of her son and let him be united to his wife.
Living separately is good. Husband and wife form a new entity.
When a mother delivers a baby, it is a joyful and a painful moment. The umbilical cord needs to be cut and the baby must be separated.
For 9 months, the baby gets nourished by the mother through the umbilical cord.
Tie the knot and cut the cord:
Similarly, when a couple ties a knot, they also need to cut the cord from their parents. Marriage may get messed up if the in-laws remotely control.
What does “United to wife” mean?
Nobody can separate them till their death.
Husband and wife must think how to make each other happy. Look out for one another. It should always be “OUR money”, “OUR house”, “jointly shared and so forth. They are one flesh.
Oneness:
Beware of people dividing husband and wife. Sometimes, husband’s mother can mistreat the wife. At that time, the husband must stand up for his wife and tell his mother with love, “Don’t speak to my wife like that”
Intimacy:
"they were naked and felt no shame" -Intimacy means mental oneness. physical oneness, emotional oneness, sharing, talking. Physical intimacy (sex) is a good thing and a godly thing as long as it is inside the marriage. It's something God thought of. It's not evil.
These 8 are a recipe for a successful marriage. If you put this into practice, you will be blessed.
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