Honouring Father and Mother

 This message was preached at Word Of Grace Church on September 21st 2025 by David Fernandes. For the audio & video please click here.  For the worship please click here. 

Honouring Father and Mother: A Pathway to Wholeness

One of the greatest treasures in God’s Kingdom is relationships. Friendships that endure over decades, families that stand together through trials, and communities that worship in Spirit and in truth remind us that God values love expressed over time. Yet, broken relationships also bring some of life’s deepest pain.

Among all the relationships we navigate, Scripture places a profound emphasis on one foundational command: “Honor your father and your mother.” (Exodus 20:12) This is not merely advice—it is a principle that carries with it a promise of blessing and longevity.

Why Honor Matters So Deeply

In Malachi 4:5–6, God warns that unless the hearts of parents turn to their children and the hearts of children to their parents, the land itself risks being cursed. That’s how central family is to the health of society. Nations aren’t transformed by policies alone, but by the strength of their families.

This truth became very real to me years ago when I faced a personal health crisis. Amid this, God used a teaching on blessings and curses to reveal something hidden in my own heart—a failure to fully honour my parents. Though I had what many would call “good parents,” the Holy Spirit gently uncovered moments where I had fallen short. In weeping repentance, I realized the weight of this command.

The Blessing of Reconciliation

Through Jesus Christ, reconciliation is possible—not only with God but also within families. 2 Corinthians 5:19 reminds us that He gave us the ministry of reconciliation. That means no matter how broken things may feel—whether from generational sin, strained relationships, or past dishonour—healing is available at the cross.

Some of us carry wounds from parents who were absent, harsh, or deeply flawed. Others may feel guilt over dishonouring them in word or deed. Yet, God calls us not to deny their shortcomings, but to choose honour. Honor is not blind approval—it is an act of obedience and humility before God.

What Does Honouring Look Like?

Honouring our parents can take many forms:

• Listening and respecting their counsel.
• Serving and providing for them in practical ways.
• Covering their weaknesses rather than exposing them.
• Expressing gratitude for the life and care they gave us.

Conversely, dishonour may show up as deceit, disobedience, rebellion, or even simply taking them for granted. Scripture places dishonour in the same category as serious sins like murder and adultery (Luke 18:20), underscoring its gravity.

When Parents Fail

What about parents who abused, abandoned, or misled us? Here lies one of the hardest truths: God still asks us to honour them. That doesn’t mean condoning sin or enabling harm but rather choosing forgiveness and entrusting judgment to Him. By doing so, we release ourselves from bitterness and open the door to God’s blessing.

Steps Toward Healing

If the Holy Spirit is stirring your heart, here are some practical steps:

1. Repent before God for any specific ways you may have dishonoured your parents.
2. Seek forgiveness—first from the Lord, then, where possible, from your parents.
3. Forgive your parents for their failings, recognizing their humanity and brokenness.
4. Take practical steps to restore the relationship, including with in-laws.

The promise of Ephesians 6:1–3 stands true today: “Honor your father and mother… so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”

Walking in Freedom

Honouring father and mother is not just about them—it’s about us stepping into God’s design for wholeness. I have personally witnessed physical healing, emotional restoration, and even unexpected blessings flow from aligning with this principle.

Today, you have an opportunity to do business with God. Whether your parents are alive or have passed on, you can choose to forgive, repent, and honour them in your heart. In doing so, you unlock a floodgate of blessing that brings freedom, peace, and joy.

Let’s live as children of the cross, not captives of our past. Let us honour our parents, and in doing so, honour our heavenly Father.

 Word of Grace is an Evangelical (Born Again),  Spirit-filled (Charismatic), Reformed, English-speaking church in Pune that upholds the Bible as God's inspired Word for life. We are a church community that has people from every part of India and parts of the world. We are here to put the Great Command and the Great Commission into practice by equipping and releasing every member into works of service.  Word of Grace is part of a wider international family of Churches called RegionsBeyond.To know more about us please log onto www.wordofgracechurch.org.