This message was preached at Word Of Grace please click here. Church on  June 1st 2025 by Navaz D. For the audio & video, please click here.  For the worship, please click here.

WHO AM I PART 2

INTRODUCTION

We are all uniquely shaped, with different personalities and temperaments. We are also gifted differently by His manifold grace. Last week, we explored our identity and how God has shaped us for a greater purpose beyond ourselves. God’s design for us is to be a part of a much bigger and grander design. So, no matter what we do in life, it all fits into an eternal purpose. Our job is to discover what part we play in God’s master plan.

Some things to keep in mind:

For a Christ follower, there is no secular and sacred divide: everything we do has a purpose.  Also, God has shaped each one of us uniquely, and we need to celebrate our differences: the introverts, the extroverts, the planners, the spontaneous, the thinkers, the feelers, the intuitive, the rationalists. God made us all!!

Last week, we examined how, throughout life, we adopt false narratives of ourselves. We examined how the world’s worldviews and belief systems can infiltrate our Christian thought and mask themselves in Christian language. We examined how we all have broken identities, and our alienation from God the Father has created an orphaned planet.

We all carry a father wound that needs healing. Please listen to last Sunday's message if you were not here last week.

Today, we will explore this Orphan heart further and how it affects our beliefs, thoughts, and actions. How can we identify it, and how can we replace it?

Jesus knows how broken we are, so He came to bind up the brokenhearted and free the captives. When He begins His work of shalom in our lives, which brings wholeness, He expects us to go and do the same and be the healing for the nations (Is 61). Again, you see the grand design in the play.

In the story of the prodigal son, we tend to focus on the younger son who went away. But that is not the point of the story. Who was in Jesus's audience? The scribes and Pharisees, who saw themselves as the good guys. Did you know that both sons operated out of an orphan spirit? The younger was overtly rebellious, independent, and self-willed. He felt his father was holding out on him and did not want to live within the rules of the house. He found it stifling. He did not love his father for who he was but for what he could get from him

The older son also functioned from an orphan spirit. He seemed obedient and dutiful, but he had no intimacy with the father, or else he would have known that everything the father had was his to enjoy. Instead, he chose to work amongst and live like a slave who did not have access to the Father’s wealth. He, too, only wanted his father’s wealth.

He tried to earn favour from duty. The religious spirit is like this. Jesus made this point to the Pharisees, but I think it's true for us today, too. We can keep the Sabbath, tithe, pray, and follow the rules, but have no relationship with the Father. Everyone should live like us and follow the rules to be blessed.

And when the father shows amazing grace to the vagabond, we get scandalised. We want everyone to go through the grind like we did.

The orphan heart can make a great Christian worker but not a great Christian brother. This heart does not understand grace and mercy. They feel the younger brother should be punished. He is offended by grace.

For some of us this orphan heart is further compounded by bad experiences in childhood – abusive home, alcoholic parents, divorce, early death of a father, physical and or sexual abuse by people who should have protected you.

We all display several of these and need to learn to replace these patterns.
Look at the list below. It is not exhaustive but indicative.

 

ORPHAN HEART	A SON
The orphan heart operates out of insecurity and jealousy. Cane & Abel	The spirit of sonship functions out of love and acceptance.
The orphan's heart is jealous of the success of his brothers and cannot celebrate it. Joseph	The mature son is committed to the success of his brothers.
The orphan heart serves God to earn the Father’s love. The Older son	The mature son serves God out of divine acceptance and favor.
The orphan heart has deep trust issues and doubts the goodness of God. Abraham	The mature son walks in the joy and presence of the Lord and lives in security & surrender to God.
The need for success drives the orphan heart and to stand out.   Spiritual orphans do not feel accepted and feel the need to prove themselves. This may result in: ·         Seeking to hide their limitations & faults – King Saul ·         Perceiving the strengths of others as competition. Saul ·         Secretly taking satisfaction in the weaknesses of others. ·         Needing and seeking attention.	The Spirit leads the mature son into his calling and mission. Our Father’s invitation is to a place of unconditional acceptance and rest in our unique, God-given identity. (1 Cor 12:18) Sons and daughters embrace both their strengths and weaknesses—comfortable both with who they are and Whose they are. Does not rejoice in the downfall of a brother or sister.
The orphan heart has anger and fits of rage.	The spirit of sonship rests in the Father’s ability to control and guide the future.
The orphan heart is always in competition with others. Performance-Orientation The spiritual orphan feels rejected, therefore believing that he or she must compensate by working hard or performing well for recognition. This may result in: ·         A constant drive to perform well ·         Judging the weaknesses or performance of other team members or leaders ·         Having feelings of mistrust towards others—feeling they are going to be ‘punished’ at any time	The spirit of sonship is always blessing others. It wants another to succeed and is not threatened by another’s success.
The orphan spirit lacks self-esteem. Fear and Insecurity The spiritual orphan is unsure of his or her place in the family. Orphans also feel uncovered and unprotected—therefore their instinct is to protect themselves and their position. This may result in: ·         A constant need for reassurance by leaders. ·         Lack of confidence in their spiritual gifts and any ministry position they have been given. ·         The need to prove themselves. ·         Being protective and territorial about their ministry areas	The spirit of sonship walks in the love and acceptance of Father God. Our Father’s invitation is to a place of security in His love, care and constant oversight. (Matt 10:29-31) Sons and daughters have nothing to fear. They are already secure in their Father’s love and place in the family. They can trust Father’s faithfulness even when changes or trials occur in church life. our Father’s invitation is to experience the fullness of His undeserved grace and favour. (Eph 1:6) Sons and daughters generously extend grace to others’ failure to measure up to actual or perceived standards. This is because they know the fullness of the Father’s grace towards them.
The orphan heart receives its primary identity through material possessions, physical appearance and activities.	The spirit of sonship is grounded in sonship and the Father’s affirmation.
Those with an orphan heart walk around with a spirit of rejection. Hence, they are hypersensitive and have an unconscious assumption that people are against them.	A Son knows he is accepted and loved by the Father.
Numbs pain with pleasure, i.e drugs, alcohol, pornography, sex, etc.	Takes his pain to God and allows the Holy Spirit to heal them from within.
Distrusts authority and finds it hard to submit.	Rebellious and self-willed.
Feels the victim and lives a powerless life	They are powerful and live above circumstances
Use control to mask their fears.	Is aware of their heart and trusts God in trials.
Has boundary issues.	Can have clear boundaries with people
Self-reliant, they feel they need to do everything on their own. Afraid to show any vulnerability	Not afraid to be vulnerable and trust others
Feels entitled, therefore grabs and looks out for number one.	Knows God as a provider, therefore can live in peace and surrender.
Struggles with forgiveness and generosity	Can forgive and give freely.
Is always a victim and feels victimised.	Is secure and able to see things for what they are.

 

So, all this has been bad news or a reality check.  What do we now? How can we replace this Spirit that besets all of us? What can we do to walk free and walk into our full identity as sons of God?

When we have intimacy with the father, we get identity. From identity, we get our inheritance, and with our inheritance, we make an impact on this Earth.
 But we have often put the cart before the horse. Many have put the Great Commission before the Great Commandment. When we know that we are loved and love God in return, we can love our neighbour not just as ourselves but as Christ. When we love as Christ, we will burn with passion for His Bride and for the lost.

Therefore, we need to learn to abide in Jesus, to remain in him, and to develop an intimacy with the Father like Jesus did. Satan and the Sanhedrin could not shake him. They tried to threaten and bully him, but he was confident in who he was because he knew whom he belonged to. He could confidently say, "The Father and I are one. I only do what I see the Father doing." He loved us with Father’s love.

John 15:9  “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. ⁰ If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commands and remain in his love”

 This moment can be a new watershed in your life. I’m not calling it season. Seasons are there for a time until the next one comes along. This is a watershed, a turning point that is going to alter your life forever if you want it. It is going to be life-transforming. You are going to activate that DNA that was put in you when you became a Christian.

There is no shortcut to intimacy. Some people want the fruit of intimacy or the benefits of intimacy, investing in it. There is no shortcut to abiding, sticking close, and learning to trust Father God.

Which son are you? Jesus in His parable did not give us the option of a third son. He is the third perfect son who knew He was loved by the Father and sought to do His will, not from wanting anything from the Father's hand, not for seeking his approval, but out of deep love and intimacy.

Let us bring our broken sonship to God so that He can heal us, restore us, and use us to bring healing to many.

We will look at replacing those false beliefs by renewing the mind next time.

 

Word of Grace is an Evangelical (Born Again),  Spirit-filled (Charismatic), Reformed, English-speaking church in Pune that upholds the Bible as God's inspired Word for life. We are a church community that has people from every part of India and parts of the world. We are here to put the Great Command and the Great Commission into practice by equipping and releasing every member into works of service.  Word of Grace is part of a wider international family of Churches called RegionsBeyond.To know more about us please log onto www.wordofgracechurch.org. 

This message was preached at Word Of Grace Church on October 30th 2022  by Navaz D'Cruz. For the audio & video please click here. To listen to the worship please click here.

HEALING A BROKEN IDENTITY

INTRODUCTION

What are the two questions everyone wants to be answered? Who am I and why am I here?

We can our identity from possessions, position or place. I want to tell you that we get our identity from a person – His name is Jesus. Our being or identity is NOT connected to doing something but knowing someone.

WHAT CAUSED THE BROKENNESS AND FRACTURED IDENTITIES?

We need to go back to Eden. We need to understand what happened there to deal with the roots. Today we are doing root treatment.

God created Adam and Eve He was their Perfect Father. They were created to have a perfect relationship with him of love, trust and intimacy. But for there to be true love and trust, there needs to be the ability to choose. So, there were these 2 trees. 

We have another character in this story. His name is Lucifer. He lived in God’s presence and was the chief worshipper but he was cast out of God’s presence which was marked by love and intimacy. He lost that forever. He became an orphan. When he saw that God made man in His own image who were enjoying the intimacy he once had he turned his hate toward mankind and was on a mission to steal, kill and destroy man’s identity, intimacy and inheritance in God.

His biggest battle is against you, a child of God. He knows that when sons of God realize and live in their identity, the earth that is his dominion will be dispelled of darkness, as sons and daughters of God shine as light and regain their lost glory because of the fall. 

GOOD NEWS

Praise God our lost connection with the Father is restored in Christ, through the cross. Jesus came to reveal the Father, and His primary mission was to reunite us with Him. We live in a fallen world and none of us escape its effects. The fall fractured our relationship not only with Father God, but with our fellowmen and nature. Man, woman and the ground were cursed.  Jesus came to restore us to the Father and heal our wounded hearts and relationships.

Yet why do many Christians struggle with this.?

The Bible tells us that when we are born again, we become children of God. We are adopted into His family.

‘The Spirit you received does not make you slaves so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him, we cry, “Abba, Father.”’ (Rom 8:15) 

SO, WHAT KEEPS US FROM LIVING SECURE IN OUR IDENTITY?

Salvation is in an instant. The Cross brings about restoration and renewal of our body, mind, and soul is a lifelong process – we are being changed from one degree of glory to another. We must partner with that renewal process. 

So, while we are born again and we are new creations in Christ, there is still a ‘sin habit’ we have to put to death. We carry some old habits into it the new kingdom. The orphan spirit is one of them. It is not cast out; it needs to be replaced. It gets replaced by truth, the truth that transforms the way we think which affects how we behave.

THE ORPHAN HEART

Satan using the orphan way of thinking to keep us from realizing our full potential

 An Orphan way of thinking affects our thinking, perception and behavior. Deep down, they struggle to understand that God loves them and that HE is good. Whenever we feel God is not looking after our best interest, we feel jealous, envious and bitter towards others which is a part of orphan thinking.

We need to recognize it, repent and replace those thought patterns with Christ-like ones. It is a daily ongoing process of renewing the mind. We have to choose to embrace sonship i.e what we have positionally we now need to walk out experientially.

Let us look at the story of THE PRODIGAL SON. Both the sons operated out of an orphan spirit? The younger was overtly rebellious, independent and self-willed.
The older son was the religious, law-abiding one but was also functioning from an orphan spirit. He seemed to be obedient, and dutiful. But he had no intimacy with the Father or else he would have known that everything the Father has was there for him to enjoy.

He tried to earn favour from duty. The religious spirit is like this. We live driven by rules rather than relationships. This spirit does not understand grace and mercy and therefore cannot celebrate another person. The older son is offended by grace. We can function like this in our families, with friends, at work and at church. It is an internal heart default position that affects how we view the world and God.

For some of us, this orphan is further compounded by bad experiences in childhood – abusive home, alcoholic parents, divorce, early death of a father, and physical and or sexual abuse by people who should have protected you.

For some, it is a deep FATHER WOUND.  There has been a steady shift in our culture and even around the world in the past few decades. Never have we seen the issue of fatherlessness in our life experiences as we see today. Fathers are absent because they have fathered children but not out of covenant. Fathers are absent because of addictions that they are enslaved to viz alcohol, gambling, drugs or promiscuity. Fathers are absent because of a job where they work long hours and sometimes seven days a week. We have fathers that are emotionally and mentally absent from the home.

We all carry a father wound that was knowingly or unknowingly inflicted upon us by our earthly fathers. And we have all been deceived by the Father of all lies and been wounded by him– the devil.

Several things could have happened to us during our growing up that could have tainted our view of the Father.

Type OF Father	Effect on the child
Distant and uninvolved	Independent and self-reliant
Angry man	Fear guilt and shame and had to manage his anger.
Negligent in providing	Insecure and with a poverty mindset and grabbing.
Cold and distant	Bonding issues
Lack of affirmation	Struggle with identity and approval seeking behavior
Critical	Fear of failure, lying, cover up, blame game
Physically or sexually abusive.	Fear, shame and a deep distrust for authority because the one that should have protected you violated you.
Showed approval only when you did things right	Acceptance is based on performance and would work hard to please and earn his love.

God wants to heal that wounded heart and reveal his Father's heart to you – that is for you, that loves you with everlasting love, that gives you more than you can ask or imagine, his love is unconditional.

All of us display several of these and need to learn to replace these patterns.
Look at the list below. It is not exhaustive but indicative

ORPHAN SPIRIT	SPIRIT OF SONSHIP
operates out of insecurity and jealousy.	functions out of love and acceptance.
is jealous of the success of his brothers and cannot celebrate it	is committed to the success of his brothers.
serves God to earn the Father’s love.	serves God from a place of acceptance and favor.
deep-rooted trust issues and doubts the goodness of God	walks in security and trusts living in surrender to God.
is driven by the need for success and to stand out. Does not feel accepted and feels the need to prove their worth. This may result in: Seeking to hide their limitations Perceiving the strengths of others as competition Secretly taking satisfaction in the weaknesses of others Needing and seeking attention.	The spirit leads the mature son into his calling and mission. Our Father’s invites us to a place of unconditional acceptance and rest in our unique, God-given identity. (1 Cor 12:18) Sons and daughters embrace both their strengths and weaknesses—comfortable both with who they are and Whose they are
displays anger and fits of rage as fake power.	rests in the Father’s ability to control and guide the situation.
in competition with others. Performance-Orientation The spiritual orphan feels rejected—therefore believing that he or she must compensate by working hard or performing well to be recognized. This may result in: A constant drive to perform well Judging the weaknesses or performance of other team members or leaders Having feelings of mistrust towards others—feeling they are going to be ‘punished’ at any time. Looks for someone to blame.	The spirit of sonship is always blessing others. It wants another to succeed and is not threatened by another’s success.  Takes responsibility for one's actions: I did something wrong versus ‘I am wrong”
The orphan spirit lacks self-esteem. Fear and Insecurity The spiritual orphan is unsure of his or her place in the family. Orphans also feel uncovered and unprotected—therefore their instinct is self-preservation. This may result in: A constant need of reassurance by leaders [2] Lack of confidence in their spiritual gifts, and any ministry position they have been given. They need to prove themselves. Being protective and territorial about their ministry areas	The spirit of sonship walks in the love and acceptance of Father God. Our Father’s invitation is to a place of security in His love, care and constant oversight. (Matt 10:29-31) They can trust in Father’s faithfulness even when changes or trials occur in church life. Our Father’s invitation is to experience the fullness of His undeserved grace and favour. (Eph 1:6) Sons and daughters generously extend grace to others’ failures. This is because they know the fullness of the Father’s grace towards them.
primary identity through material possessions, physical appearance and activities.	The spirit of sonship is grounded in the Father’s affirmation.
walk around with a spirit of rejection. Hence, they are hyper-sensitive and have an unconscious assumption that people are against them.	knows he is accepted and loved by the Father.
Numb pain with pleasure i.e., drugs, alcohol, pornography, sex etc.	Takes his pain to God and allows the Holy Spirit to heal them from within.
Distrusts authority and finds it hard to submit
Feels the victim and lives a powerless life. Is often caught in a drama triangle where they play the Victim.	Is powerful and live above circumstances and take responsibility for their actions and choices.
Use control to mask their fears	Is aware of their heart and trusts God in trails
Has boundary issues	Can have clear boundaries with people
Self-reliant, and feel they need to do everything on their own. Afraid to show any vulnerability	Not afraid to be vulnerable and trust others
Feels entitled therefore grabs and looks out for number one	Knows God as the provider and therefore can live in peace and surrender.
Struggles with forgiveness and generosity	Can forgive and give freely.

It was for freedom Christ came to set us from – to set the captive free, the bind up the broken hearted, to proclaim freedom. The beautiful thing in the Kingdom is that then the ones who were broken now help heal others. We have all been broken. But we have experienced healing and restoration in the cross. 

When we have intimacy with the Father, we get identity. From identity, we get our inheritance and with our inheritance, we make an impact on this planet.

ORPHAN: I Do – I Have – I Become

SON: I Am – I have – I do

When we learn to cultivate a relationship with Jesus, we will also grow close to the Father, because He and the Father are one. Remain in him. Develop intimacy with the Father as Jesus did.

If you want to start your journey of renewal and walking away from orphan thinking and behaving – you first need to acknowledge it. God gives graces to the humble. God will come in and heal those wounded places in your heart. 

Word of Grace is an Evangelical (Born Again),  Spirit-filled (Charismatic), Reformed, English-speaking church in Pune that upholds the Bible as God's inspired Word for life. We are a church community that has people from every part of India and parts of the world. We are here to put the Great Command and the Great Commission into practice by equipping and releasing every member into works of service.  Word of Grace is a part of a wider international family of Churches called RegionsBeyond.To know more about us please log onto www.wordofgracechurch.org.